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Blog Page, Career Coaching, Change Careers, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Find Your Why, Meaningful Work

The Difference Between Change and Transition

With COVID-19, we are navigating a shared change and very individual transitions.

Yes, there is a difference between the two.

They may feel the same, but they are very different. Change is external and transition is the internal process we experience in response to change. There are two books, both written by William Bridges, that I use when I work with clients in career and life transition. And this pandemic is certainly a career and life transition that none of us have experienced before.

Change is something that happens to people, even if they don’t agree with it. Transition, on the other hand, is internal: it’s what happens in people’s minds as they go through changeChange can happen very quickly, while transition usually occurs more slowly.” ~William Bridges

COVID-19 has changed us all. And, we are all transitioning in our very personal ways.

Using Bridges’ model, there are three stages of transition. Endings, The Neutral Zone, and New Beginnings.

  • ENDINGS: Loss, letting go, saying goodbye. If you are here, we talk about the importance of honoring what is ending. I’ve had clients plant trees, bury tokens, and unsubscribe to industry news to mark the ending of a chapter. Marking the end is necessary before a new beginning can start. 
  • THE NEUTRAL ZONE: Characterized by chaos, instability, disorientation. Sound familiar? And, also present in massive quantities in this zone are creativity, innovation, and possibility. If you are here, this state is temporary. The most important thing we can do is be compassionate with ourselves, find resources, support systems, and use mindful strategies to be open to the innovation and creativity that shares this space.
  • NEW BEGINNINGS: This is a phase of reorientation, acceptance, and identification with a new way of being. It may be that you accept the new that has replaced the old or that you see a sense of who you are becoming on the other side. If you are here, there may be relief that you’ve navigated through the uncertainty, there also may be new anxiety, excitement, and awareness that change may come again.

The change that the pandemic has forced upon us is shared. The transition we experience individually is very personal. Everyone moves through these stages at their own pace. I believe the more resources we have, the better.

These books are my go-tos. Bridges’ down-to-earth, practical concepts can help us navigate this shared yet very individual experience.

Blog Page, Career Coaching, Change Careers, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Find Your Why, Meaningful Work

We know of the glass ceiling. Ever heard of the glass wall?

We know of the glass ceiling. Ever heard of the glass wall?

A young woman stood on one side of a glass wall, watching her company’s business event happening on the other side. She was in there moments ago with her heels and suit. 

But pretending that she cared about the corporate blah-blah-blah wasn’t her jam. She left to get some air and caught the scene through the glass that now separated her from the event – and her fake self from her real self.

After years of deciphering clues from many glass wall moments, she fakes it no more.

If you’ve had your own glass wall moments – looking in, not feeling connected, not wanting to be connected – ask yourself:

  • What’s the scene I’d be excited to rejoin?
  • Who are the people, what is the environment, vibe, dress, emotion from that scene?
  • What are people talking about? Making? Creating? Building? Solving?

And maybe even

  • How can I create my own scene and invite others in?

Shatter the glass wall. Live you genuine.

I can help you do that. It’s my jam. 

Blog Page, Career Coaching, Change Careers, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Find Your Why, Meaningful Work

Has COVID-19 Revealed Your Why?

Is Your Purpose Unfolding During the Coronavirus Pandemic?

Sometimes we follow an instinct or our intuition, like an internal whisper, to make a career or life change and we aren’t clear on exactly why we are compelled to honor that whisper. Sometimes, we find value and meaning right away. Sometimes we struggle. And, sometimes, that “Big Why” is revealed much later…like during a global pandemic.

I am launching a video interview series and want to talk to people who are fully realizing the value of their shift during the Coronavirus crisis. I want to know how your your path unfolded. 

Here are two short ( 2-min) videos explaining the Honor the Whisper Project. Forgive the rough cut on the 2nd when my dog generously contributed to the audio!

Let’s create something together! Email Barbara@LiveYourGenuine.com or connect on LinkedIn to share your story.

Blog Page, Change Careers

3 Ways to Increase Your Capacity at Work and in Life 

Jonah Hill, actor-director-producer, was interviewed on the Howard Stern Show in October 2018 (I’m an unapologetic fan since the early ’90s) and something Jonah said about doing work he loves resonated so deeply with me that I made note of it and posted a meme. Little did I know that one month later, I would stumble across an opportunity to immerse myself in a brain-based coaching program to learn more about how creating and connecting forms the framework for building our capacity at work and in life.

Capacity. What is that anyway? Is it the amount something can hold? Is it output? It can be both; holding and doing. We can apply the word to how much water an unyielding glass can hold before it overflows or how many parts a machine can produce in one hour but capacity interests me most when applied to humans.  We aren’t always great at recognizing our potential for growth. Rigid and limiting visions of ourselves and can allow output, our “doing”, to be sabotaged by what we tell ourselves about our capacity.

You are more than your limited perception of you and your capacity is greater than you realize.

As a coach who works with clients in major career and life transition, I know that capacity for finding solutions, identifying new possibilities, and dealing with setbacks increases when people are in a builder mindset. Just as capacity can be described as holding and doing, getting to a builder mindset boils down to creating and connecting. Begin by paying attention to these three things:

  1. Notice if you are separating more than connecting – with yourself and with others.

Humans are hard-wired to connect. When we rely only on ourselves or are not connecting with our genuine self in meaningful ways, we are limiting our awareness and possibilities. When you notice you are going it alone ask yourself questions like Who might have new ideas about this? And who else? If I asked my real self, what would she say? Who else could be on this team?

  1. Pay attention to whether you are reacting more than you are creating.

Reacting is a fight/flight/freeze response and our best decisions and solutions aren’t born here. When you notice you’re reacting to everything “out there” or waiting for the next shoe to drop or reacting only to the needs of others and not your own, ask yourself or your team What possibilities does this challenge present? What opportunities do you see? What part of this can be influenced?

  1. Take deliberate action to move on the scale toward creating and connecting.

Move away from separating and reacting. Make the call, send the email, schedule the meeting, wake up 15 minutes early, write the blog post…DO something to move that needle.

What you will find is that connecting leads to creating and creating leads to connecting and it is in this cycle that we build our capacity for almost anything life and business throws at us.

Want to learn more? Connect here to learn more about what we could create together!

Blog Page, Images, job search anxiety, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Is Fear Sabotaging Your Job Search?

Still putting off the job search you vowed to begin after the holidays?

The yearly bonus is safely in the bank.  The holidays are over.  You’re back to the grind and already feeling drained about the idea of spending another year, let alone another week, doing what you’re doing.   It’s time to start looking, but the fear of beginning your job search is paralyzing and you can’t seem to get moving.

Common among job seekers in all stages of their career, anxiety surrounds the search process.   Market conditions and state of the economy aside, it feels like you’re putting yourself in a position to be judged.   Somebody will judge you on everything from your resume format, to your education, to your work history, to your choice of interview attire.  You put yourself in front of others, and then wait to find out if you’re “good enough”.  At least that’s how it feels.  Even a healthy self-esteem can find the process daunting.

If you’re stuck, consider these tips to help change your mindset and face fears head-on so you can get out of your own way:

1.  Are you stressed because you don’t have it all figured out?  You can’t “think” yourself into the perfect job.   There is no way for you to be certain that you’re going like what’s next until you try it. Too much introspection breeds paralysis.  Think for a little while – but then act.

2.  Worried about selling yourself in an interview?  Be yourself in the interview.  There’s a difference.

3.  Transform the “I’m not good enough” worry by remembering that the Hiring Manager is considering if you’re a right match for a position; not if you’re a good and decent human being. You’re so much more than your job title.

4.  Take the “I might fail” fear and accept that you might.  You can learn tons about yourself (and what you don’t want in another job) by NOT succeeding.

5.  Afraid of putting your resume together?  Prepare.  Have someone else put their eyes on it. Get help from a pro.  Same goes for interviewing. If you are rusty, or if you know you’ve bombed before, enlist the help of a mentor for some mock interview practice.  Better to “bomb” in practice than in real life.

6.  Eliminate some of the fear of the unknown in an interview by concentrating on things you can control: your attire, arriving on time (10 minutes early), bringing a fresh copy of your resume, eye contact, general body language, questions for the Hiring Manager, etc.

7.  Set small, attainable goals.  (Warning – this may mean disturbing your comfortable routine of wine and FaceBook at night.) So, do you want to make this change or not?  Commit to some type of action each day (or every other day) to keep your job search moving.  One phone call, one resume submission, one bullet point on your resume is a step.

Fear leads to overthinking which leads to anxiety which leads to paralysis which keeps you stuck.  Action, no matter how small, can interrupt the fear and allow you to feel a sense of control over the process.  Once you feel like you have some control over the stress of the search, maybe you’ll even want to consider turning any remaining fear into curiosity.  And that’s when the magic really happens.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Power in the Pause

As featured in Natural Awakenings Magazine, December 2013 http://www.healthylehighvalley.com/LHV/December-2013/Power-in-the-Pause/
For forty hours each week (or more) we pack up mind, body, and spirit, grab our coffee, and show up at work. Like it or not, all three parts are right there with us in the cubicle, on the shop floor, or in the big office with the best view. Our minds are engaged, our body sits or stands and moves comfortably in our work space, and our spirit feels content as we do our “work worth doing.” Or not.

Career Wellness plays a role in the mind/body/spirit equation. When things aren’t well at work, it affects how we perceive the level of wellness in our lives overall.   We bring the stress from our work back home and into our relationships. We carry it in our bodies and it affects our health.

While the demands of real life don’t always make it easy to change our work situation, we can focus on our own personal growth by practicing mindfulness in the workplace.  Google, Twitter, General Mills and other large corporations as well as a growing number of smaller companies across the country are incorporating mindfulness training into their business models. However, if we aren’t fortunate enough to work in an organization that has embraced this type of training, we can take matters into our own minds!

In its simplest form, mindfulness is turning our intention and attention to the present moment without judgment.  I like to think of mindfulness as a focused and compassionate pause.  The secret is that there is so much power in that tiny pause.

When we are mindful, we witness our thoughts and feelings as a true observer. It is from this vantage point that we are better able to choose our actions consciously, from a place of awareness and emotional intelligence. When we are mindful, we notice our foot tapping faster and faster during a meeting that is cutting into our lunch hour. We PAUSE. We notice. We accept. We choose our action.

When we act from this place of present-moment awareness, we may not like the situation, but we can take power from the pause and make better decisions than if we act from a place of frustration, anger and anxiety. Notice the stress and the anxiety. Acknowledge it. Once acknowledged, we can choose to give it power or not. Being mindful at work doesn’t mean being tolerant of challenging or negative situations. It means addressing those situations from a more focused place to increase your chances of a healthy outcome.

The scientific evidence on the effectiveness of mindfulness has grown in recent years and supports and spearheads the growing trend toward mindfulness in the workplace. WorkWithMindfulness.com is a site that provides an overarching summary of what the science of mindfulness is saying. In quoting from studies from various peer-reviewed journal papers, the site summarizes evidence that mindfulness:

  • Reduces reactivity, helping us let go of unhelpful habits and make wise choices
  • Helps regulate our nervous systems and reduces stress hormones
  • Allows us to feel more connected with others and engage in more empathetic interactions
  • And, studies show that mindfulness may help sharpen our cognitive performance; including concentration and working memory

Often, work stress comes from a sense of feeling like we are powerless in our job. Mindfulness reminds us that we are never powerless. There is power in each and every moment.  Focusing attention on the here and now stops us from handing our power over to others. “My foot is tapping? Oh, why look at that, yes it is! I’m so glad I noticed that. Now I can take a deep breath, or three, and return to this typically-annoying situation with a sense of power over how I react to it.”

If only it were that simple. Here is how I like to introduce the practice of being mindful:

  • First, become aware of the practice of mindfulness. (Pause. Notice. Accept. Act.)
  • Next, practice the practice of mindfulness.
  • Finally, keep practicing the practice of mindfulness!

When we begin the journey of being mindful, it is often easier to begin outside of the area which is causing the most stress. Instead of trying to be instantly mindful in the middle of a volatile boardroom setting, begin your practice in a more benevolent setting: while taking a walk, petting the dog, mowing the lawn or making dinner. The more we become accustomed to pausing in tranquil moments, the more naturally we will find ourselves doing it in challenging situations.

So, tomorrow morning, when we grab our coffee and head to work with mind, body, and spirit in tow, let’s pause. Find the power in that pause. Notice the texture of the coffee cup, notice the aroma and the steam; notice our body’s reaction to it. Be grateful for the way it warms our hands. And let’s start the work day by being well in that moment.

Barbara Berger, CPC, CCC is a Certified Career Coach who specializes in working with women in transition, mid-life career changers and students.  Connect at Barbara@CareerWellnessPartners.com or visit www.CareerWellnessPartners.com.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Systems + Processes = FUN (NOT!)

That formula was written on a sticky note and affectionately placed on my computer screen by my colleagues in my former role as a Hiring Manager.   It was no secret that I fell short when it came to details and rule-following.  My company used DISC assessments (love that tool) internally and helped clients do the same.  It was obvious that I, as a D/I, found it a real stretch to follow the systems that were put in place and necessary for others to do their jobs properly.  A business needs systems to run smoothly and I know this, but I really struggled with upholding my end of the deal.

I don’t believe I’m entitled.  I don’t believe that I have the right to NOT do things the way they are supposed to be done.  I try to follow the formulas provided to ensure a streamlined work flow but I don’t always succeed.  My files are a mess, the way I organize isn’t like everyone else’s way, and I often make it difficult for others to fulfill their responsibilities without coming back to me with things I’ve missed.  Thankfully, in that company, I worked with dedicated, professional, authentic women and we all supported each other’s strengths while acknowledging and helping to fill in where we were weak.   Every organization should be so evolved!

I’ve tried my entire life to follow the formulas.  I was constantly trying to figure out what was wrong with me and why it was so challenging to stay on a straight line.  Then I finally realized that there’s nothing wrong with me and I accepted that, for me, Systems + Processes = Hell.

Systems + Processes = Hell!

There are employees everywhere who, unlike me, may have been written up, or terminated or left to their own devices to try to keep their heads above water.  If that sounds like you, it doesn’t mean you’re not worthy.  It may mean you’re in the wrong job, maybe you’re not in a position that draws on your strengths and minimizes your weaknesses.  It may mean you have to reevaluate the types of jobs you’ve been searching for because this is a consistent theme in your work history.  Finding Career Wellness can sometimes be as easy as starting with these things:

1.  Deem yourself worthy (even though you have weaknesses).

2.  Acknowledge where you fall short.

3.  Laugh at yourself – find humor in your flaws (and in others’).

4.  Support others who are weak where you are strong.

5.  Do your best; and ask for help where you need it.

6.  Seek out positions and companies that value and utilize your strengths.

The sticky note with the formula is now proudly framed and displayed in my office.  It reminds me that I’m not perfect.  It reminds my clients that they don’t have to be perfect either. 

If you do well working with formulas, why not write your own unique formula for Career Wellness?  Once you have your formula, you are better armed to make career decisions that align with your core strengths and values.  Mine would be:

Creativity + Freedom + Relationships + Helping = JOY!

Commit to creating your own formula for 2014, either in your current role or as you seek a new position, and ask yourself if your choices fall into the formula.  Even I can see that this system, which is really just taking what your gut already knows and putting it on paper in front of you, is a necessary first step for gaining a new perspective on your life at work.

Blog Page, Uncategorized

CWP in Natural Awakenings Magazine – Nov 2013

If you haven’t picked up your copy of Natural Awakenings Magazine, Lehigh Valley Issue, for November 2013 check out Career Wellness Partners on pages 8 and 57!  Or click here for a direct link to CWP article!

The publication is a perfect fit for the mission of Career Wellness Partners in Allentown, PA.  The CWP career coaching practice is laser-focused on helping people awaken to their “work worth doing”.

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