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Change Careers, Mid Life Professionals

When You Fall Out of Love with Your Job

There are lucky souls on this earth who find their calling early. Many of us envy them, but some people find it in their early years. They may be 22 and on their way through medical school knowing that they were put on this earth to heal someone. It doesn’t mean they’ve peaked of course, but it does mean they’re lucky.

Some people find their calling early and then fall out of love with it. Things happen in life that change us, change our jobs, or change our industries. Companies change and responsibilities evolve. Sometimes we are promoted out of a job that was the perfect fit for us, or we outgrow the perfect job.

The Challenges for Older Employees

When you’re young and looking for your calling life appears filled with opportunities, and most of the time you’re living on less than you elders. Perhaps you rent an apartment and live in a city. You probably don’t have dependents. Of course, I realize there are things like student debt and individual challenges, but hear me out.

As you climb your career ladder, you get used to certain things. Apart from a larger paycheck than your early career years, you probably have earned a certain level of responsibility and respect within your company and industry. Maybe even a title that reflects that. You also probably have a mortgage, more luxuries in your life that you don’t want to give up, and children who depend on you. Leaving the job you used to love for a new one you’re passionate about may mean giving up a lot. It’s frightening, but so is the idea of spending the rest of your work life in a job that drains you.

First Steps Focus: Your Mindset

Like almost everything we try to accomplish in life, fear is the primary obstacle to our success. Fear of losing our material belongings, status, and security are especially difficult when we look to alter our career. And of course, the demon of all fears – fear of failure – overshadows it all. There is no easy answer; tackling fear can be a show-stopper if we let it. So my one piece of advice, the only way I know to get past it, is to accept it. Know and accept that you will be scared, and get comfortable with that fear.

But understand this, it won’t always be scary. You will actually, despite what you think now, get used to the idea of change and it will become less scary. And you don’t have to QUIT your job. You can do the work on yourself and your career without giving up your job, you just have to commit to it and remain focused, and disciplined, on walking down that path.

Next Steps

If any of what I described above resonates with you, and you desperately want to love your job again, there is help out there. This is what career coaches do. You don’t have to work with me; I’m not trying to hard-sell you, but trust me, working with a professional can make this journey far less scary, and far less frustrating.

Need some inspiration? Check out this post about how four people in different stages of their careers successfully made a shift happen.

photo credit: Alfonsina Blyde » I will try fix you via photopin (license)

Employee Engagement

What Employees Need To Know About Employee Engagement

There’s a lot of talk about employee engagement out there, but as an employee, remember these things:

No matter what your company does, it’s all up to you.

It’s your company’s job to set the stage for engagement and to create a culture that pushes all of the engagement hot buttons: relevance, a sense of autonomy, growth, meaning, etc. That’s their job. They can set it all up, but you have to want it for yourself.

Companies can lead an employee to engagement but….

They can’t make you drink their Kool-Aid, right? Why would you want to anyway? Your job is to make a recipe for your own Kool-Aid and contribute to the company you’re with while tweaking your own ingredients. Instead of disengaging because you’re not feeling the vibe where you are, engage for the purpose of finding out where you should be instead.

Become your own career coach.

Use the opportunities the company gives you for your personal career development plan. You may have other goals than staying where you are. That’s fine – but don’t be a victim while you’re there. Make every company-sponsored perk an opportunity to analyze your strengths and interests. Take advantage of any assessments your company offers. Consider it free coaching! Only you have to know why you’re engaging. Instead of being skeptical about their manipulative tactics to get you to perform, perform for your own benefit. The company still wins, but you win too. Take what you learn to move within your existing organization if you can or on to your ideal role somewhere else. Just don’t sit on the sidelines and complain.

Yes, it’s all about their bottom line.

What about your bottom line? The company is doing their job. What are you doing? If you are sitting around waiting for the right perk to make you happy, you’re part of the problem. Companies have poured years of research and time and money into figuring out why engagement numbers aren’t what they want. What have you done for yourself to take accountability for your career wellness? Engagement is good for all, so be the manager of your own career and make your bottom line just as valuable. Think employee engagement is only for managers and executives? It’s really about you. You just haven’t been informed of how to use it yet.  Keep reading to learn more.     photo credit: Rochester Memorial Art Gallery, Rochester, NY via photopin (license)
Blog Page, job search anxiety, Mid Life Professionals, Women in Transition

Why Trust Career Serendipity?

Look back over your career. How did you land where you are? Chances are you’ll be able to identify a random meeting, an unplanned collaboration, or chance event that represents a critical moment that helped you on your way to where you are right now.

Pooneh Mohajer, founder of Hard Candy and two other startups, talks about career serendipity:

It’s funny, we have these plans for ourselves, these well-laid plans, and then you meet someone or are influenced by something or exposed to something; and we end up going in another direction, which is great.

Read the full Inc.com article here.

Notice serendipitous events. Be mindful enough to sense your gut reaction to them. Be brave enough to act on them. That’s how to create a brilliantly fulfilling career.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

What Do These Four Successful Career Shifters Have in Common?

SHIFT HAPPENS!

It may not happen as fast as you want it to happen. It may not be easy. But it does happen.  

Take a look at the following examples:
Recent Grad: Executed shift from retail to professional role in logistics/distribution
(Networking & Recruiter)

Early Career: PhD transitioned to new field and landed industry dream job
(Networking & Job Board)

Middle Career: Finance professional successfully re-entered workforce (Networking)
Late Career:  Seasoned sales professional refused to take company restructure as an off-ramp to retirement – landed major sales position in high-volume market (Networking)

What do they have in common?
1. Yes, they are all recent clients, but the next two points are where I want you to pay attention.
2. They all incorporated some form of networking, some way of making new connections, into their job search strategy. (Note that only one in four landed their new gig by applying on a job board – supporting the popular job search statistic that 80% of positions are filled though networking.) Use job boards. Definitely. But not as your only approach.  
3. All of these shifters took ownership of their career wellness. They created their next steps. They didn’t lead with fear. They worked hard. They didn’t listen to the naysayers. They had the guts to take action and the stamina to keep going when they felt like quitting. 

From creating a strong brand on LinkedIn to attract the attention of recruiters, to learning the art of the informational interview, these shifters made it happen.

Kudos to them for showing the rest of us how to do it right.

Blog Page

Have Your Career Cake

There is something incredibly rewarding about working they way I want to work, not because someone is telling me what to do or how to do it. Something so fantastically different about working my own gig and knowing that the compensation is a result, from start to finish, of my own efforts. Not to mention that I value the money so much more because I’m in a helping/teaching/giving role which is where my gut knows, and past career experiments show, I belong.

There is something so decadent about having the freedom to structure my work day as I choose. It might mean the ability to take a break to eat the last piece of cheesecake for a mid-morning snack (I just did that), or thinking through a presentation while taking the dog for a walk (much better option than the cheesecake.)

But that’s me.

Does it mean I sometimes work at midnight, or during the evening between my boys’ baseball games, and on weekends? Yes, it does. There’s a cost to every decision. However, for me, this way works best.

I love my offices. I have a home office where I work with candles lit, or incense burning, or loud music, or soft music or Howard Stern on XM. I talk to (and answer) myself. At my other office, where I see clients and pay rent and get my dose of human interaction, it’s tiny and cozy and it’s me. (Sans Howard Stern and the out-loud personal dialogue.)

I value freedom, and variety, and days that I get to structure any way I like. Some days I’m seeing clients all day, some days I’m delivering workshops, other days I’m writing resumes, or LinkedIn profiles, or blog posts. I love options.

But that’s me.

What about you? Do you need quiet? Do you need lots of social interaction? Do you need tight deadlines to perform your best? Do you want to walk away from the day at 5:00 and not have to think about it until you punch in again the next morning? Do you need to be outside?

There is no one way, no way more important than another, to work. There is only your best way and you need to know what it is so you can help make a well-informed decision about your career options.

If you know that you need structure and clear-cut, specific guidelines during your time at work, then that is a huge piece of the puzzle for you. And when you know something like that about yourself, and how you work best, you begin to make choices. Better choices. Aligned choices. Choices that lead to career wellness.

How do you find out what your best way is? You experiment.

Pamela Slim talks about “thinking like a scientist” in her book Body of Work:  Finding the Thread That Ties Your Story Together.

When talking about what makes or breaks an entrepreneurial journey, Slim writes;

What I mean specifically is a willingness to create a working hypothesis, test it, observe with curiosity, ask why, tweak, retest, observe, et cetera, until you are satisfied.

Experimentation is not only a journey for entrepreneurs, I believe it is how we need to view career development as a whole. Anyone’s career. We are all experimenting in our own way, to find our individual best way, to work.

Take some time to reflect on past experiences, pay attention to current situations, and make a list of times when you know you preformed at your best.

It’s not for the weak; this experimentation thing. There are lots of hypotheses that deliver disappointing results. When this happens, add the experience to your list, break down what you learned about yourself, and experiment again. And again.

Keep experimenting until you notice that one of your experiments leads to unexpected peace, surprising happiness and an increased feeling of overall wellbeing.

When that happens, celebrate with cheesecake.

He’d rather walk!

cheesecake photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/10506540@N07/5806546039

Blog Page, job search anxiety, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

How Saying “Yes” Moves Careers

Check out these 3 scenarios where saying “yes” moved real people to the next leg of their careers.  None are over-the-top-non-relatable-stories where someone with a few million in savings chucked it all to find their bliss as a scuba instructor.  These are examples of how saying “yes” to occurrences which, in hindsight, we call “serendipitous events,” can re-chart your career course.  They may seem inconsequential at the time, but when we connect the dots and see how staying open can influence our career path, it’s worth a serious look.

1.  “Have you ever done any bookkeeping?”  L’s aunt asked.  “Some, but I’m not a fan;” L replied.  “Well,” her aunt continued, “your kids are getting older and I need to find someone to manage my part-time bookkeeping job while I head to Florida for three months this winter.  Wanna do it?”  In her head, L thought, “Why not, I can do anything for 3 months, even bookkeeping, and I’ll get paid, and I’ll see what it feels like to work part time after being home with kids for five years.” After taking a few days to consider what she would do for child care, L agreed, not knowing that this “yes” began her re-entry into the workforce. (When her aunt returned in the spring, L was asked to join the organization in a role more suited to her past experience and skill set.)

2.  “I heard that you do some freelancing on the side.  Do you want to work on some marketing materials for my business?” Already balancing work, freelance, family and more, the “Yes!” that S heard coming from his mouth surprised him.  It eventually led to a significant freelance gig and ultimately to being signed on as an employee of the company where he stayed for the next 6 years.   This new assignment allowed him to relinquish some of his more time-consuming (and stressful) freelance jobs and build on a specific product area of expertise.  His “yes” resulted in a total industry change (even though he wasn’t looking for one) and propelled his career in a new direction while achieving a level of work-life balance he never even expected.

3.  The voice on the phone said, “E, we want you to work here, in the poorest school district in the area.  With your experience, we’d love to have you.”  She thought; “Out of the burbs and into the bowels of the city?  Hmmmmm?  I’ve been teaching students in a district where bedtime stories are expected, where pantries full of food are taken for granted and test scores are highest in the state.  Why would I go teach where the school feeds their students three meals a day, where resources are scarce, and where turnover is ridiculously high?”  The answer came quietly, but with clarity; “Because I’m needed there.  There are a ton of teachers waiting to take my place at this school; they don’t need me here.  But those kids…they need me there.”  “Yes, I’ll take, it;” she answered.” (E is now on the road to making a difference in lives of disadvantaged youth and, she says, evolving as a human in ways she could have never imagined.)

Note that each person above dealt with a fear of saying yes.  Fear of becoming a working mom and all that goes with that, fear of taking on more work and upsetting family balance, fear of going from a cushy-comfortable routine to something unpredictable.  In each case, the gut instinct, the unexplained pull to say yes, trumped fear.

I’m calling for guest bloggers who are willing to share how an unplanned YES moved them in an unexpected career direction. Click for submission guidelines.

Photo credit:  Flickr via  renaissancechambara

Blog Page, Images, job search anxiety, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Is Fear Sabotaging Your Job Search?

Still putting off the job search you vowed to begin after the holidays?

The yearly bonus is safely in the bank.  The holidays are over.  You’re back to the grind and already feeling drained about the idea of spending another year, let alone another week, doing what you’re doing.   It’s time to start looking, but the fear of beginning your job search is paralyzing and you can’t seem to get moving.

Common among job seekers in all stages of their career, anxiety surrounds the search process.   Market conditions and state of the economy aside, it feels like you’re putting yourself in a position to be judged.   Somebody will judge you on everything from your resume format, to your education, to your work history, to your choice of interview attire.  You put yourself in front of others, and then wait to find out if you’re “good enough”.  At least that’s how it feels.  Even a healthy self-esteem can find the process daunting.

If you’re stuck, consider these tips to help change your mindset and face fears head-on so you can get out of your own way:

1.  Are you stressed because you don’t have it all figured out?  You can’t “think” yourself into the perfect job.   There is no way for you to be certain that you’re going like what’s next until you try it. Too much introspection breeds paralysis.  Think for a little while – but then act.

2.  Worried about selling yourself in an interview?  Be yourself in the interview.  There’s a difference.

3.  Transform the “I’m not good enough” worry by remembering that the Hiring Manager is considering if you’re a right match for a position; not if you’re a good and decent human being. You’re so much more than your job title.

4.  Take the “I might fail” fear and accept that you might.  You can learn tons about yourself (and what you don’t want in another job) by NOT succeeding.

5.  Afraid of putting your resume together?  Prepare.  Have someone else put their eyes on it. Get help from a pro.  Same goes for interviewing. If you are rusty, or if you know you’ve bombed before, enlist the help of a mentor for some mock interview practice.  Better to “bomb” in practice than in real life.

6.  Eliminate some of the fear of the unknown in an interview by concentrating on things you can control: your attire, arriving on time (10 minutes early), bringing a fresh copy of your resume, eye contact, general body language, questions for the Hiring Manager, etc.

7.  Set small, attainable goals.  (Warning – this may mean disturbing your comfortable routine of wine and FaceBook at night.) So, do you want to make this change or not?  Commit to some type of action each day (or every other day) to keep your job search moving.  One phone call, one resume submission, one bullet point on your resume is a step.

Fear leads to overthinking which leads to anxiety which leads to paralysis which keeps you stuck.  Action, no matter how small, can interrupt the fear and allow you to feel a sense of control over the process.  Once you feel like you have some control over the stress of the search, maybe you’ll even want to consider turning any remaining fear into curiosity.  And that’s when the magic really happens.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Power in the Pause

As featured in Natural Awakenings Magazine, December 2013 http://www.healthylehighvalley.com/LHV/December-2013/Power-in-the-Pause/
For forty hours each week (or more) we pack up mind, body, and spirit, grab our coffee, and show up at work. Like it or not, all three parts are right there with us in the cubicle, on the shop floor, or in the big office with the best view. Our minds are engaged, our body sits or stands and moves comfortably in our work space, and our spirit feels content as we do our “work worth doing.” Or not.

Career Wellness plays a role in the mind/body/spirit equation. When things aren’t well at work, it affects how we perceive the level of wellness in our lives overall.   We bring the stress from our work back home and into our relationships. We carry it in our bodies and it affects our health.

While the demands of real life don’t always make it easy to change our work situation, we can focus on our own personal growth by practicing mindfulness in the workplace.  Google, Twitter, General Mills and other large corporations as well as a growing number of smaller companies across the country are incorporating mindfulness training into their business models. However, if we aren’t fortunate enough to work in an organization that has embraced this type of training, we can take matters into our own minds!

In its simplest form, mindfulness is turning our intention and attention to the present moment without judgment.  I like to think of mindfulness as a focused and compassionate pause.  The secret is that there is so much power in that tiny pause.

When we are mindful, we witness our thoughts and feelings as a true observer. It is from this vantage point that we are better able to choose our actions consciously, from a place of awareness and emotional intelligence. When we are mindful, we notice our foot tapping faster and faster during a meeting that is cutting into our lunch hour. We PAUSE. We notice. We accept. We choose our action.

When we act from this place of present-moment awareness, we may not like the situation, but we can take power from the pause and make better decisions than if we act from a place of frustration, anger and anxiety. Notice the stress and the anxiety. Acknowledge it. Once acknowledged, we can choose to give it power or not. Being mindful at work doesn’t mean being tolerant of challenging or negative situations. It means addressing those situations from a more focused place to increase your chances of a healthy outcome.

The scientific evidence on the effectiveness of mindfulness has grown in recent years and supports and spearheads the growing trend toward mindfulness in the workplace. WorkWithMindfulness.com is a site that provides an overarching summary of what the science of mindfulness is saying. In quoting from studies from various peer-reviewed journal papers, the site summarizes evidence that mindfulness:

  • Reduces reactivity, helping us let go of unhelpful habits and make wise choices
  • Helps regulate our nervous systems and reduces stress hormones
  • Allows us to feel more connected with others and engage in more empathetic interactions
  • And, studies show that mindfulness may help sharpen our cognitive performance; including concentration and working memory

Often, work stress comes from a sense of feeling like we are powerless in our job. Mindfulness reminds us that we are never powerless. There is power in each and every moment.  Focusing attention on the here and now stops us from handing our power over to others. “My foot is tapping? Oh, why look at that, yes it is! I’m so glad I noticed that. Now I can take a deep breath, or three, and return to this typically-annoying situation with a sense of power over how I react to it.”

If only it were that simple. Here is how I like to introduce the practice of being mindful:

  • First, become aware of the practice of mindfulness. (Pause. Notice. Accept. Act.)
  • Next, practice the practice of mindfulness.
  • Finally, keep practicing the practice of mindfulness!

When we begin the journey of being mindful, it is often easier to begin outside of the area which is causing the most stress. Instead of trying to be instantly mindful in the middle of a volatile boardroom setting, begin your practice in a more benevolent setting: while taking a walk, petting the dog, mowing the lawn or making dinner. The more we become accustomed to pausing in tranquil moments, the more naturally we will find ourselves doing it in challenging situations.

So, tomorrow morning, when we grab our coffee and head to work with mind, body, and spirit in tow, let’s pause. Find the power in that pause. Notice the texture of the coffee cup, notice the aroma and the steam; notice our body’s reaction to it. Be grateful for the way it warms our hands. And let’s start the work day by being well in that moment.

Barbara Berger, CPC, CCC is a Certified Career Coach who specializes in working with women in transition, mid-life career changers and students.  Connect at Barbara@CareerWellnessPartners.com or visit www.CareerWellnessPartners.com.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Systems + Processes = FUN (NOT!)

That formula was written on a sticky note and affectionately placed on my computer screen by my colleagues in my former role as a Hiring Manager.   It was no secret that I fell short when it came to details and rule-following.  My company used DISC assessments (love that tool) internally and helped clients do the same.  It was obvious that I, as a D/I, found it a real stretch to follow the systems that were put in place and necessary for others to do their jobs properly.  A business needs systems to run smoothly and I know this, but I really struggled with upholding my end of the deal.

I don’t believe I’m entitled.  I don’t believe that I have the right to NOT do things the way they are supposed to be done.  I try to follow the formulas provided to ensure a streamlined work flow but I don’t always succeed.  My files are a mess, the way I organize isn’t like everyone else’s way, and I often make it difficult for others to fulfill their responsibilities without coming back to me with things I’ve missed.  Thankfully, in that company, I worked with dedicated, professional, authentic women and we all supported each other’s strengths while acknowledging and helping to fill in where we were weak.   Every organization should be so evolved!

I’ve tried my entire life to follow the formulas.  I was constantly trying to figure out what was wrong with me and why it was so challenging to stay on a straight line.  Then I finally realized that there’s nothing wrong with me and I accepted that, for me, Systems + Processes = Hell.

Systems + Processes = Hell!

There are employees everywhere who, unlike me, may have been written up, or terminated or left to their own devices to try to keep their heads above water.  If that sounds like you, it doesn’t mean you’re not worthy.  It may mean you’re in the wrong job, maybe you’re not in a position that draws on your strengths and minimizes your weaknesses.  It may mean you have to reevaluate the types of jobs you’ve been searching for because this is a consistent theme in your work history.  Finding Career Wellness can sometimes be as easy as starting with these things:

1.  Deem yourself worthy (even though you have weaknesses).

2.  Acknowledge where you fall short.

3.  Laugh at yourself – find humor in your flaws (and in others’).

4.  Support others who are weak where you are strong.

5.  Do your best; and ask for help where you need it.

6.  Seek out positions and companies that value and utilize your strengths.

The sticky note with the formula is now proudly framed and displayed in my office.  It reminds me that I’m not perfect.  It reminds my clients that they don’t have to be perfect either. 

If you do well working with formulas, why not write your own unique formula for Career Wellness?  Once you have your formula, you are better armed to make career decisions that align with your core strengths and values.  Mine would be:

Creativity + Freedom + Relationships + Helping = JOY!

Commit to creating your own formula for 2014, either in your current role or as you seek a new position, and ask yourself if your choices fall into the formula.  Even I can see that this system, which is really just taking what your gut already knows and putting it on paper in front of you, is a necessary first step for gaining a new perspective on your life at work.

Blog Page, Mid Life Professionals, Uncategorized, Women in Transition

Lights. Camera. ACTION!

But what if there are no lights.   And, what if there is no camera?  What if all you have is that little voice inside that keeps whispering “Action”?  That voice is telling you, over and over again, in different ways, how to become the Director of your own life.  Will you trust that voice to direct your first step?   It’ll do a better job than Spielberg or Scorsese ever could because, after all, this is your life.   That little whisper (which often becomes a shout if you ignore it) is nobody else’s but yours.  If you feel that you’ve been acting in someone else’s movie until now, it’s time for action.

Whether you’ve been sitting in the same cubicle for 15 years, or you’re re-entering the workforce after some time away, or you’re trying to find work that aligns with your core values, making a decision to change can be unnerving.

You think about what that little voice is telling you. And you think.  And think. Until you find that you’ve thought yourself into a state of paralysis; making it almost impossible to take action.  That’s really just fear. Honoring the voice doesn’t mean you have to do a 180° right there on the spot.  It means that introspection will only take you so far.  Action, often the smallest step, is what you need to honor the internal whisper and start your shift to Career Wellness.

I must share a few lines from “You Don’t Need to Know How to Do It.  You Just Need to Start;” an article by Ishita Gupta, Publisher of fear.less Magazine.  It’s a great compilation of the things we think we need before we take any action.  Believing we need these things causes paralysis:

“You don’t have to have the best team, the right website, or be an expert. You have everything you need right now; you just need the courage to act. 

You don’t have to wait for investors or your boss to notice your smarts.  You recognize it first.

You don’t have to feel guilty for spending time on what makes you happy.  You do have to worry if you never listen to the voice inside you.”

Read the full article here.  I bet you’ll recognize a few of these paralyzing “must-have” thoughts.

Self-reflection is definitely part of your career development, but it can be the very thing that keeps you feeling like you are an actor in someone else’s movie.  As Herminia Ibarra states in her book Working Identity, “Sometimes all we know at the start is that we want to be somewhere else.”

We rarely know where we are going to end up; but taking one tiny step can change the course of your story and help direct your career in a way that aligns with that little voice.   Can you hear it? (Because it’s screaming now.)  “Annnnd ACTION!”

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